Sometimes we can never understand how God destine our lives. The events in the past few weeks has definitely opened my eyes and set me on a spiritual journey i never had imagine.
The thought of losing someone i love so dearly started this journey. I am still fighting for the love of my life. On the outside, people would have told me to stop. But, after solat hajat, yasin and recitation of surah al mulk ( ayah 14) i got some dreams that gave me hope. The dreams came from Allah as my guidance, and deep down, my niat has always been sincere.
I am not ahli tafsir mimpi, so i can never be too sure about the meanings of the dreams. But, by asking someone who knows about inteprating dreams, i was told that most of my dreams were "good signs".
I did istikarah in the past, and never really had dreams that guided me to a certain decision.(maybe once that had happened, but when it did happened i was not mengamalkan solat istikarah that particular night. So i really don't know). I'm nervous as to how will things unfold and how it will end. I really hope that Allah will accept my doa, and kabulkan my wishes.
Allah is my witness that I'm doing this because i do not want to lose her, especially to someone that i believe is the wrong man. Serahkan urusan ini kepada Allah. Insya Allah, Allah will help me.
Ya Allah, aku memohon padaMu agar doaku Kau kabulkan. Keluarkanlah dia daripada penganiyaan ini. Kasihanilah dia, kasihanilah daku , dan kasihanilah kami.
Wednesday, 23 March 2011
Sunday, 27 February 2011
Feels like Home
The song entitled "Feels like Home" was a song that i came to like. It embodies everything that i see in love.
In the past few weeks have been difficult for me. I asked for a divine intervention after pretty hapless in all my efforts. Alhamdulillah, so far the signs are good. InsyaAllah I will always istiqamah in my prayers and doas cause I know that she is worth fighting for.
Ikhlas or sincere in loving her is something that i knew months ago. I knew i fell in love with you, my pink bunny, even before we agreed to meet. This past weeks have strengthen and convinced me that I love you so much.
I just hope that when the big moment appears, you will stand up and fight for us. This time, our love will prevail, insya Allah.
Ya Allah, I pray to you, that things will change for the better.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fBMwz6ovdZI
In the past few weeks have been difficult for me. I asked for a divine intervention after pretty hapless in all my efforts. Alhamdulillah, so far the signs are good. InsyaAllah I will always istiqamah in my prayers and doas cause I know that she is worth fighting for.
Ikhlas or sincere in loving her is something that i knew months ago. I knew i fell in love with you, my pink bunny, even before we agreed to meet. This past weeks have strengthen and convinced me that I love you so much.
I just hope that when the big moment appears, you will stand up and fight for us. This time, our love will prevail, insya Allah.
Ya Allah, I pray to you, that things will change for the better.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fBMwz6ovdZI
Saturday, 19 February 2011
The hardest weeks of my life
As i write this, i am suffering from a near breakdown. two weeks of hell has taken its toll on me. i could not sleep, hardly eaten anything, mental torment to the max and become so unfocus of the things happening around me.
i just pray that things will turn around for the better in the next few days. My prayers in the middle of the night centered around you. May Allah help us to be together again.
I will keep on fighting for you. I believe what we have is worth fighting for. I miss you like a child misses his blanket. i love you, my pink bunny. You are my true love.
i just pray that things will turn around for the better in the next few days. My prayers in the middle of the night centered around you. May Allah help us to be together again.
I will keep on fighting for you. I believe what we have is worth fighting for. I miss you like a child misses his blanket. i love you, my pink bunny. You are my true love.
Tuesday, 29 June 2010
29 June 2010,
I have been dreading this day. It was a day that, 5 years ago, I would never could have imagine. Yes, I have joined the "3 series" club. No, I am not scared of being old. But rather, I am thinking of what could I have, or should have, achieved before I reach this wonderful milestone.
There was once the idea of a simple life. You know, the simplest of the simplest. A good job with good pay, a house, a wife and kids. Am I content? No, I think I have a good job, something that I have been targeting since I graduated. And the other stuff, unfortunately they are still a dream.
Come 29 June 2011, my vow is to accomplish most of that simple life philosophy. Need to purify the soul first, and I will do it insya Allah this year. Oh Allah, do not let my life in my hands even for a second, guide me and bring me success. Amen.
There was once the idea of a simple life. You know, the simplest of the simplest. A good job with good pay, a house, a wife and kids. Am I content? No, I think I have a good job, something that I have been targeting since I graduated. And the other stuff, unfortunately they are still a dream.
Come 29 June 2011, my vow is to accomplish most of that simple life philosophy. Need to purify the soul first, and I will do it insya Allah this year. Oh Allah, do not let my life in my hands even for a second, guide me and bring me success. Amen.
Monday, 7 June 2010
The girl in the white dress
years have passed,
time has gone,
never would I imagine,
that I'll meet you again.
a new white dress,
the same person inside,
with nothing left to say,
could not even say hi.
I left with mix feelings,
and I know that the time has passed,
there is no turning back,
or regret of what might have been.
for you, I'll always pray,
that you find happiness always,
we move forward and never back,
the girl in the white dress is forever gone.
time has gone,
never would I imagine,
that I'll meet you again.
a new white dress,
the same person inside,
with nothing left to say,
could not even say hi.
I left with mix feelings,
and I know that the time has passed,
there is no turning back,
or regret of what might have been.
for you, I'll always pray,
that you find happiness always,
we move forward and never back,
the girl in the white dress is forever gone.
Tuesday, 25 May 2010
Gold - Preservation of wealth (might be wrong, but that is what I believe)
As I wrote this piece, I just opened my first Gold Account with Kuwait Finance House. A firm believer in Gold investment since early this year, I was searching for the best shariah compliant gold investment account. Luckily KFH launched their new shariah compliant gold acoount product just a few months ago.
In short, today I met a lovely Customer Service Executive by the name of Rafizah- Mrs Rafizah I would assume looking at the ring on her finger. (damn!). She guided me and my father on the product and was very nice and informative. To be honest, I already made up my mind 2 days ago that I would open a gold account with KFH. She did not actually "sold" me the product so to speak, but she did "assured" me that I made the right decision.
All I needed to do was to open a normal saving account with KFH, and all the gold transactions must go through this account. Minimum initial investment was 10grams, with the price of RM129.25 per gram (as of 24 May 2010). Unfortunately, I could not transfer my money from Maybank to KFH, so I needed to withdraw cash from the nearest ATM machine. That pretty much limited my initial investment. Anyway, not to be distracted by petty issue, I quickly withdrew money from the nearest ATM machine, and bought XX grams of gold as my initial investment.
The theory goes that gold prices will increase exponentially in the next few years as oppose to linear appreciation like in the previous years. The chief culprit is the world economic downturn has spark panic amongst investor and spook them out of bonds, shares and equities. So, people now are turning to land and gold to preserve their wealth. I am not jumping the bandwagon, but rather choose to diversify my investment and thought that gold would be the safest investment as the value will always be parallel with inflation at the least. Thus, owning say a RM10k of gold now would be the same "value" in the years ahead, whatever the inflation rate factor is.
Looking forward to monitor all my investment portfolios. I would expect my gold investment to be atleast double in value in the next 5 years. May this be the first steps of many good things in life. Amen.
Note : As far as I am aware, only KFH offers shariah based Gold investment account. The other two banks, Public Bank and Maybank, only offer conventional account. "What constitute a shariah gold investment account?" you might asked. I did some digging on this, and apparently to qualify to be shariah compliant account, one major criteria is that the bank must be able to show the buyer the physical gold whenever the buyer wants within 3 days maximum. As an example, if I bought 10 grams of gold, then decided that I want it in physical shape rather than just "statement on a piece of paper", the bank must be able to give me the physical gold within 3 days. I can't remember which bank, Public or Maybank, which mentioned that their gold is kept in a facility in New York, and would not be able to give the buyer the physical gold.
I also must note that KFH trades 99.5% fineness gold rather than 99.9% as used by Maybank or Public Bank. Although this means that the gold quality of KFH is slightly lower quality and cheaper than the two other banks, a gold is still a gold. Most important factor in my mind is the transaction must be Islamic, and until the likes of Maybank or Public Bank can offer islamic gold account, I will have to stick with KFH.
One other disadvantage of KFH gold is, although you can have the physical gold in your hand, you cannot turn it into jewellery. This is due to KFH gold is specially wrapped in a box with serial number and they will not buy back the gold from you other than in mint box condition. So, you can say farewell of turning the gold into pendant or ring if you have any intention of selling it back to KFH.
In short, today I met a lovely Customer Service Executive by the name of Rafizah- Mrs Rafizah I would assume looking at the ring on her finger. (damn!). She guided me and my father on the product and was very nice and informative. To be honest, I already made up my mind 2 days ago that I would open a gold account with KFH. She did not actually "sold" me the product so to speak, but she did "assured" me that I made the right decision.
All I needed to do was to open a normal saving account with KFH, and all the gold transactions must go through this account. Minimum initial investment was 10grams, with the price of RM129.25 per gram (as of 24 May 2010). Unfortunately, I could not transfer my money from Maybank to KFH, so I needed to withdraw cash from the nearest ATM machine. That pretty much limited my initial investment. Anyway, not to be distracted by petty issue, I quickly withdrew money from the nearest ATM machine, and bought XX grams of gold as my initial investment.
The theory goes that gold prices will increase exponentially in the next few years as oppose to linear appreciation like in the previous years. The chief culprit is the world economic downturn has spark panic amongst investor and spook them out of bonds, shares and equities. So, people now are turning to land and gold to preserve their wealth. I am not jumping the bandwagon, but rather choose to diversify my investment and thought that gold would be the safest investment as the value will always be parallel with inflation at the least. Thus, owning say a RM10k of gold now would be the same "value" in the years ahead, whatever the inflation rate factor is.
Looking forward to monitor all my investment portfolios. I would expect my gold investment to be atleast double in value in the next 5 years. May this be the first steps of many good things in life. Amen.
Note : As far as I am aware, only KFH offers shariah based Gold investment account. The other two banks, Public Bank and Maybank, only offer conventional account. "What constitute a shariah gold investment account?" you might asked. I did some digging on this, and apparently to qualify to be shariah compliant account, one major criteria is that the bank must be able to show the buyer the physical gold whenever the buyer wants within 3 days maximum. As an example, if I bought 10 grams of gold, then decided that I want it in physical shape rather than just "statement on a piece of paper", the bank must be able to give me the physical gold within 3 days. I can't remember which bank, Public or Maybank, which mentioned that their gold is kept in a facility in New York, and would not be able to give the buyer the physical gold.
I also must note that KFH trades 99.5% fineness gold rather than 99.9% as used by Maybank or Public Bank. Although this means that the gold quality of KFH is slightly lower quality and cheaper than the two other banks, a gold is still a gold. Most important factor in my mind is the transaction must be Islamic, and until the likes of Maybank or Public Bank can offer islamic gold account, I will have to stick with KFH.
One other disadvantage of KFH gold is, although you can have the physical gold in your hand, you cannot turn it into jewellery. This is due to KFH gold is specially wrapped in a box with serial number and they will not buy back the gold from you other than in mint box condition. So, you can say farewell of turning the gold into pendant or ring if you have any intention of selling it back to KFH.
Wednesday, 5 May 2010
The one that got away,
As I listen to a song by Chantal Kreviazuk (who? well she sang "Leaving on a Jet Plane" from the film Armageddon), entitled "Feels like home", I can't praise enough the ryhthm and lyrics of that song. And listening to the lyrics, does made my mind reversing a few years back.
I guess, the song reminds me of my old flame in some ways. Don't get me wrong, I do not hold my past anymore. It is just sometimes you wondered,was she the one who got away?
For the better, it was a turning point of my life and hers. And, it was better that we parted. "Redha" is the right word to sum up the break up. Life goes on.
I guess, the song reminds me of my old flame in some ways. Don't get me wrong, I do not hold my past anymore. It is just sometimes you wondered,was she the one who got away?
For the better, it was a turning point of my life and hers. And, it was better that we parted. "Redha" is the right word to sum up the break up. Life goes on.
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