Emotional and spiritual journey

Sometimes we can never understand how God destine our lives. The events in the past few weeks has definitely opened my eyes and set me on a spiritual journey i never had imagine.
The thought of losing someone i love so dearly started this journey. I am still fighting for the love of my life. On the outside, people would have told me to stop. But, after solat hajat, yasin and recitation of surah al mulk ( ayah 14) i got some dreams that gave me hope. The dreams came from Allah as my guidance, and deep down, my niat has always been sincere.
I am not ahli tafsir mimpi, so i can never be too sure about the meanings of the dreams. But, by asking someone who knows about inteprating dreams, i was told that most of my dreams were "good signs".
I did istikarah in the past, and never really had dreams that guided me to a certain decision.(maybe once that had happened, but when it did happened i was not mengamalkan solat istikarah that particular night. So i really don't know). I'm nervous as to how will things unfold and how it will end. I really hope that Allah will accept my doa, and kabulkan my wishes.

Allah is my witness that I'm doing this because i do not want to lose her, especially to someone that i believe is the wrong man. Serahkan urusan ini kepada Allah. Insya Allah, Allah will help me.

Ya Allah, aku memohon padaMu agar doaku Kau kabulkan. Keluarkanlah dia daripada penganiyaan ini. Kasihanilah dia, kasihanilah daku , dan kasihanilah kami.

Feels like Home

The song entitled "Feels like Home" was a song that i came to like. It embodies everything that i see in love.
In the past few weeks have been difficult for me. I asked for a divine intervention after pretty hapless in all my efforts. Alhamdulillah, so far the signs are good. InsyaAllah I will always istiqamah in my prayers and doas cause I know that she is worth fighting for.

Ikhlas or sincere in loving her is something that i knew months ago. I knew i fell in love with you, my pink bunny, even before we agreed to meet. This past weeks have strengthen and convinced me that I love you so much.

I just hope that when the big moment appears, you will stand up and fight for us. This time, our love will prevail, insya Allah.

Ya Allah, I pray to you, that things will change for the better.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fBMwz6ovdZI

The hardest weeks of my life

As i write this, i am suffering from a near breakdown. two weeks of hell has taken its toll on me. i could not sleep, hardly eaten anything, mental torment to the max and become so unfocus of the things happening around me.


i just pray that things will turn around for the better in the next few days. My prayers in the middle of the night centered around you. May Allah help us to be together again.


I will keep on fighting for you. I believe what we have is worth fighting for. I miss you like a child misses his blanket. i love you, my pink bunny. You are my true love.